Tiger Woods has a very interesting and colorful history. Besides being arguably the greatest golfer of all time, he’s also had incidents off the course that have kept him in the headlines. The most notable of them was in 2009 when his wife at the time reportedly attacked him with a golf club, smashing items in the house and maybe even smashing Tiger himself. Fast forward to 2021. Tiger left Riviera Country Club for a preplanned appearance and was nearly killed in a one-car accident. There was a lot of speculation about the cause of the accident but details were in short supply, adding to the mystery.
Nearly two years to the day after the motor vehicle accident, Tiger made news once again. While playing with his friend Justin Thomas in the first round of the Genesis Open at the same Riviera Country Club outside of Los Angeles, Tiger subtly handed Justin a tampon after he outdrove Justin on one of the holes. The gesture was captured by a photographer, and it quickly became viral. The venom came from all directions: commentators from Sports Illustrated, Golf Channel and every major news outlet condemned the joke. Women’s rights groups, happy to have something other than trans rights to talk about, immediately jumped on the bandwagon.
Before we cancel Tiger, let’s do a little analysis. The average drive on the PGA tour travels about 300 yards. The average drive on the LPGA tour travels about 250 yards. The average male recreational golfer drives the ball 226 yards while the average female golfer drives it 146 yards. The best women golfers in the world easily outdrive the average male recreational golfer, but they still trail the best men golfers in the world by a sizable margin. The same is true of their recreational counterparts. News flash: On average people who are born female are not as large, as fast or as strong as average people who are born male.
Having to explain a joke to people who have no sense of humor is pointless, but here’s an attempt: The members of the PGA tour and the average male golfer don’t menstruate. Members of the LPGA tour and the average female recreational golfer do or did at one time. This joke is a way for one guy to sarcastically tell another guy that they might belong in the group with the people who don’t hit it as far. That’s it.
Male bonding is different from female bonding, on average. Male bonding is typically based on shared interests, spending time laughing and joking and generally having fun together. Female bonding (on average) is based on more of an emotional connection. I don’t know how much junk talking goes on when a group of four women play golf together. But I know what it’s like when four guys are playing – especially if they know each other well.
I’ve often said that people who complain about perceived micro-aggressions in the office or at school must never have played sports. Watch any pick-up basketball game in a park or schoolyard and you’ll hear all manner of ribbing and subtle insults. As a kid I enjoyed the Bronc Burnett book series. These books were written in the 1940s and 50s by Wilfred McCormick and were based on the adventures of the title character as he played high school sports. In one book, one of the characters got the nickname “rabbit ears” for his tendency to react to taunts from the crowd or the other team. Much of the book was about his learning to ignore the chatter and focus on the task at hand. This is an important lesson that people in general, and boys in particular, need to learn in order to be successful in life.
Even adult men of retirement age continue the banter from their youth. On many holes there will be chatter about whose drive went the furthest. You’ll often hear the guy who hit it the longest say something like “nice drive” sarcastically to the guy who came in second. He might even add “that’s probably the best drive you’ve ever hit on this hole” as an extra little dig. Leave a putt short and you’re likely to hear “hit it Alice” from the guy who hit the putt, and “nice putt – does your husband play golf?” from one of his playing companions. Comparing a guy’s performance to a girls is as traditional in male sports as it gets.
Is it childish? Absolutely. Is it appropriate in mixed-gender or professional environments? Absolutely not. Is it appropriate between guys who are enjoying themselves? I believe it is and believe it would be a mistake to drive this kind of humor out of society all together. The anti-capitalism, equity not equality, anti-male, anti-white movements that are so active at this time don’t seem to be interested in intent, only content. This kind of humor does serve a purpose for males and laughter contributes to their overall health and happiness.
So Tiger’s mistake. In my opinion it was apologizing. Whenever the gotcha police find famous people doing anything that a segment of the population might find offensive, the first reaction by the PR people is to issue a public apology. The first news cycle is about what they did and the next cycle is about whether the apology was good enough. I would have loved for Tiger to have gotten behind a microphone and said something like this:
My friend Justin and I were caught on video having a private moment of fun. Every golf fan knows that Justin is one of the longest hitters on the PGA tour and when I hit one past him I thought I’d give him a little ribbing. It was a private exchange that was not intended for public consumption. It would not be an appropriate joke to tell from podium or through social media and wasn’t delivered that way. If you were offended by it, it’s your problem – it wasn’t meant for you. It was not a commentary on women’s sports or women in general. It was a joke between two friends – get over it.
It seems like some of the comedians affected by cancel culture are starting to do just that. Roseanne Barr’s new show is called “Cancel This” where she takes aim at the people who ruined her career for having a divergent opinion. Dave Chappelle and Ricky Gervais are two other comedians who have successfully pushed back against this anti-humor crowd. I hope more will join them.